By Adam Kaplan
Anyone that has been around me for the past twelve months knows that I have a serious Ted Lasso fixation. The show, which was born of a television commercial has become my most referred to and quoted piece of media. I quote Ted Lasso in times of stress and in times of joy. The first season of that show spoke to me in so many ways. The interactions of the characters have inspired me to be more caring, more understanding, more forgiving, and more accepting of those around me in a way that, truly, no other television show ever has.
Having said that, I have been outraged that the show poached one of my go-to talks for the bi-summer All Staff Meeting towards the end of each session: The Goldfish Talk. In an episode of the show, Ted (the coach of a professional soccer team) is trying to console and uplift a player that made a mistake in a game and is beating himself up over it. He tells the player, “You know what the happiest animal on earth is? It’s a goldfish. You know why? It’s got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish.” His message to this player is to put the mistake behind him and focus on what he can do moving forward. This is a charming idea…and was ruthlessly stolen from the Camp Nebagamon All Staff Meetings with no credit whatsoever being tossed towards the brilliant camp director that has been using it to help his staff for years. (Ok…maybe I borrowed it from someplace else too…but my memory is conveniently fuzzy on this point.) During our meeting, I tell the counselors that despite the fact that we are rapidly approaching the end of the session and they may have not yet been able to make a difference in every camper’s life, there is still time. Because children are like goldfish. So even though the counselor may have missed the opportunity to connect with his camper thus far, the camper will not remember that failing if you make the end special. That is what they will remember…
As we hit December 1st of what has been a challenging couple of years for all of us, it is natural to look back on what the year has been like. I’d like to ascend to my bully pulpit (yeah, no idea what I did to assume the right to preach to so many!) to remind all of us that, in fact, we are all goldfish. There is still time to make 2021 feel like it was a terrific year and to send all of our loved ones into 2022 feeling good about themselves and our relationships with them.
And, lucky for us, December is chock-full of opportunities to connect and forge or reinforce special relationships with those around us. Whether it be the giving holidays, or New Year’s revelry, or the fact that so many of us are gifted with so much extended family time during December, we are presented with many chances to make the final stretch of the year meaningful. All of us goldfish have the opportunity to wave goodbye to 2021 fondly and feeling good about things.
As with anything though, this will take some effort. It won’t just happen. So let’s all commit to making that happen with these last 31 days. Instead of viewing gifting as a chore, how about we all really spend some time to figure out what would be meaningful to those we will be giving gifts. Think about what moves them, or inspires them, or brings them joy and make your gifts elicit these feelings. (And let’s not forget that gifts do not have to be material.) Use your extended family time wisely. Plan some fun, memorable, and even moving time together. (And don’t worry…despite the metaphor I am working into this article, the memories will last more than ten seconds.) And when New Year’s Eve rolls along, try planning something special for whomever you will be celebrating with. But, more importantly, take a few minutes that day or evening to connect with those that are important to you to let them know how much they mean to you and how much you appreciate them, particularly those with whom your connection has suffered some damage due to inattention or conflict. The words you share will stick with them, and even if you cannot completely repair the relationship, the fact that you are making the effort will make a difference to them and to you.
Embrace the goldfish in everyone. Let’s send 2021 off in a way that will make us recognize that despite whatever challenges the world throws at us, life is a special gift, made more special by the people around us and our connections with them. In fact, in true goldfish fashion, I have already forgotten about the intellectual property lawsuit I intended to bring against the Ted Lasso folks for stealing my goldfish speech, and am only grateful to them for inspiring me to touch all of the other goldfish in my life this month.
(I apologize for the preachy nature of the article this month. To be completely honest, it is really just a cathartic message to myself and a way to hold myself accountable for making sure that I put in the effort this month to make it meaningful for myself…and hopefully those in my sphere.)
On a more personal level this November brought the opportunity to reach the end of a big goal I set for myself and started hiking toward back in January. I completed the “Hike 100 Challenge” on the North Country National Scenic Trail, which consists of hiking 100 miles on the NCNST in one calendar year. The North Country National Scenic Trail is a 4600-mile-long trail that stretches from Middlebury in central Vermont to Lake Sakakawea State Park in central North Dakota and is part of the National Park Service administered National Scenic Trail system. The trail passes through the eight states of Vermont, New York, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota, and North Dakota. We are very lucky that about 100 miles of the 200 miles of trail that pass through Wisconsin are right here in Douglas County (the home county of Camp Nebagamon). The “Hike 100 Challenge” is a program sponsored by the North Country Trail Association. Besides bragging rights hikers that complete 100 miles on the NCNST also receive a certificate and patch upon completion. This was my second try at the “Hike 100 Challenge,” because I under estimated the commitment need in 2020 and was only able to make it 47 miles that year. So, in January I reset my sights on the goal and hit the trail hard in 2021 and with my 5-pound hiking buddy (my pet Yorkshire terrier, Zigs) at myside crossed the 100-mile goal on November 7th! My next NCNST goal is to complete every trail mile in the state of Wisconsin, because what fun is a life without goals!
6th Grade Campers: Zander Aronoff, Holden Bell, Zach Bell, Chris Chiles, Alon Cohen, Rollie Cohen, Jake Finkelstein, Gabe Fisher, Evan Friedman, Saul Friedman, Milo Gilman, Ryan Glickman, , Max Goldfarb, Silas Gold-Kessler, Hadley Goldsmith, Henry Harris, Wilson Heeringa, Landen Hudson, Oren Korczak, Nathan Massel, Eli More, Hudson Rufi, Eli Sands, Brett Sholiton, Jacob Solomon, Dylan Varon, Felix Yessian
5th – Amir Margerum, Hank Pulitzer